Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
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