EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
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