I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
Fuck appropriateness.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
The chlamydia really affected his face.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
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