do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
Randomize
