NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
Randomize
