How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
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