Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (702): View more from Nevada

  we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.

  (1-702): View more from Nevada

  do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (702): we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast. (1-702): do you want me to pick up budweiser instead? http://tfl.nu/46t6
  Replies (24) Good night (5415) Bad night (699)
• Favorite

  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (608): imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord" http://tfl.nu/17lg
  Replies (61) Good night (6402) Bad night (1052)
• Favorite

  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  wrong asian. never thought that would happen.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (401): wrong asian. never thought that would happen. http://tfl.nu/96tp
  Replies (16) Good night (1323) Bad night (4017)
• Favorite

  (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (780): No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better http://tfl.nu/pitl
  Replies (42) Good night (7731) Bad night (2238)
• Favorite

  (419): View more from Ohio

  fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (419): fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back. http://tfl.nu/wq3e
  Replies (11) Good night (4691) Bad night (1972)
• Favorite

  (816): View more from Missouri

  My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (816): My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis. http://tfl.nu/3uql
  Replies (10) Good night (5984) Bad night (883)
• Favorite

  (931): View more from Tennessee

  Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (931): Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me.... http://tfl.nu/xfhz
  Replies (11) Good night (1555) Bad night (3623)
• Favorite

  (740): View more from Ohio

  Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (740): Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed? http://tfl.nu/4keg
  Replies (12) Good night (2916) Bad night (1092)
• Favorite

  (913): View more from Kansas

  the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (913): the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head. http://tfl.nu/5rt7
  Replies (8) Good night (670) Bad night (2142)
• Favorite

  (360): View more from Washington

  5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (360): 5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina http://tfl.nu/2med
  Replies (16) Good night (1974) Bad night (807)
• Favorite

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (832): i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?! http://tfl.nu/yoqa
  Replies (9) Good night (2150) Bad night (494)
• Favorite

  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (724): She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail. http://tfl.nu/o810
  Replies (13) Good night (716) Bad night (2773)
• Favorite

  (817): View more from Texas

  Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (817): Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go. http://tfl.nu/gkdk
  Replies (5) Good night (860) Bad night (356)
• Favorite

  (619): View more from California

  You fucked that MILF against my car!

  (415): View more from California

  How would you know?

  (619): View more from California

  She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (619): You fucked that MILF against my car! (415): How would you know? (619): She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her http://tfl.nu/6u9g
  Replies (5) Good night (801) Bad night (471)
• Favorite

  (517): View more from Michigan

  I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (517): I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right? http://tfl.nu/axzn
  Replies (0) Good night (455) Bad night (280)

Randomize