It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
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