Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
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