Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
How dare sober me try to tell drunk me I can't eat the applesauce in the fridge! Stingy bitch IM EATING THE APPLESAUCE! you can tell sober me I said that.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
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