Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
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