Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
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