so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
Randomize
