He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
You made out with two different species that night
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
Randomize
