then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
So much Jack, so little girl.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
