Whoa Z and x make the same sound
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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