I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
Randomize