are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Randomize
