Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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