I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize
