They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
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Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
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Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
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