The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
Randomize
