Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
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I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
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you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.