I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Randomize
