i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
Randomize
