best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
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