You're a womanizer and a bitch.
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
Randomize
