Rock
Scissors
Fuck
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
Randomize