youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
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