she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
that is very illegal...i love you.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
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