Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
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