So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
