you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
Randomize
