oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
thus making me awesome and them whores
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
Got a snapchat from Megan last night showing you sobbing about a burrito on the floor with Dan in the background trying not to laugh his ass off
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Randomize
