I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
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