You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
Randomize
