So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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