is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
Randomize
