Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Randomize
