Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
Randomize
