I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
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