I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
Randomize
