I want to stick my p in your. b.
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
Randomize
