on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Randomize