People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
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