the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
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