don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
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yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
Oh god. I finally realized why the coked out Stevie wonder was explaining the concept of movember to the McDonalds clerk. Drunk me didn't process that another month comes after Halloween... It's apparently November.
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I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
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