We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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