Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
Randomize
