nut hugger
How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
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