Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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