And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Randomize
